TIHL #13 How to Play the Electronic Keyboard (A short vignette)

It was Tuesday, August 1st, 9:30 am. Chapel on the 3rd floor of University Good Samaritan Center was off to a rockin' start. My supervisor was jamming on his guitar and I was dutifully trying to obey his order to "Give me some honky-tonk piano, Danielson!" (My version of honky-tonk piano probably sounded about as authentic as Eminem playing classical music on the 'cello, but I was certainly giving it my best effort.) We were a couple of notes into a chorus of "Soon and very soon we are going to see the king" when I noticed that my keyboard and my supervisor's guitar were painfully out of tune. I thought that perhaps I had caused something to go awry when I'd hit the transpose button, since we'd agreed to take the tune down a step. I pushed the button labeled "Tuning" a couple times whilst trying to just keep playing. The keyboard still sounded unbearably awful, so I was forced to pause for a minute. I fumbled with a few more buttons, including the one I'd been searching for in the first place, cleverly labeled "Transpose." Confident that I was finally in the same key as my guitar player, I struck a grandiose chord just in time for the verse "No more dyin' there..." Though I'd played an F major chord, the sound that ironically burst forth was "Bam, bam, bam, pow, pow, zap!" Evidently I'd inadvertently changed to the "gunshots" sound effect during my button pushing marathon. Everyone, including the very priestly be-robed intern running the service, completely lost it. I couldn't manage to squeak out even one word for the rest of the song. As my supervisor so helpfully pointed out, at least the gunshot sounds were finally in the right key!