TIHL #4 Chocolate is not necessarily the answer...
Warning: I have written about some fairly silly topics, but this one is the most ridiculous yet.
I have this magnet that says "Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is?" I consider it to be a motto of sorts. Lately, however, it would seem that chocolate has not been on my side. (Well, its leftover calories are probably clinging somewhere around my sides, but that's not really what I meant.)
The first problem I've been having involves chocolate milk. (The kind you mix yourself out of Nesquick, not the kind that comes out of brown cows.) I think the absolute best part of a tall glass of chocolate milk is when you get to the bottom- you know, where all that gritty sugar that never quite mixed in has settled? Try as I might to contort my tongue in every way possible, I can never quite get that last little bit of goodness. Usually, in desperation, I end up tipping the glass upside down and trying to let gravity take over. Unfortunately, as a result of this last ditch effort,I have actually choked on chocolate milk grit two or three times in the past weeks. I'm taking a bit of a stab in the dark here, but I'm guessing that this problem is uniquely my own.
The second incident involved a baking-related quandary. I really REALLY thought that my already scrumptious Rice Krispie (TM) bars could be improved if I could only add a drizzling of chocolate on top. Since I've never met a chocolate I couldn't melt, I thought that substituting a Hershey's bar for a few chocolate chips would be of little consequence. Apparently, I was in error. I would make the post hoc analysis that Hershey's bars have so many preservatives that they are fully indestructible, because the offending bar went from completely formed and solid to burned/vaporized in a matter of about 15 seconds. Needless to say, the Rice Krispie bars ending up remaining in their natural state. (In contrast, the kitchen smelled completely unnatural for the next several hours.) I guess we can't all be Betty Crocker.
It might be time for chocolate and I to do a bit of redefining in our relationship. In light of this new evidence, I would be a fool to continue professing that chocolate is the answer to all life's connundrums. But I think I'll keep my magnet, just in case. :-)
I have this magnet that says "Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is?" I consider it to be a motto of sorts. Lately, however, it would seem that chocolate has not been on my side. (Well, its leftover calories are probably clinging somewhere around my sides, but that's not really what I meant.)
The first problem I've been having involves chocolate milk. (The kind you mix yourself out of Nesquick, not the kind that comes out of brown cows.) I think the absolute best part of a tall glass of chocolate milk is when you get to the bottom- you know, where all that gritty sugar that never quite mixed in has settled? Try as I might to contort my tongue in every way possible, I can never quite get that last little bit of goodness. Usually, in desperation, I end up tipping the glass upside down and trying to let gravity take over. Unfortunately, as a result of this last ditch effort,I have actually choked on chocolate milk grit two or three times in the past weeks. I'm taking a bit of a stab in the dark here, but I'm guessing that this problem is uniquely my own.
The second incident involved a baking-related quandary. I really REALLY thought that my already scrumptious Rice Krispie (TM) bars could be improved if I could only add a drizzling of chocolate on top. Since I've never met a chocolate I couldn't melt, I thought that substituting a Hershey's bar for a few chocolate chips would be of little consequence. Apparently, I was in error. I would make the post hoc analysis that Hershey's bars have so many preservatives that they are fully indestructible, because the offending bar went from completely formed and solid to burned/vaporized in a matter of about 15 seconds. Needless to say, the Rice Krispie bars ending up remaining in their natural state. (In contrast, the kitchen smelled completely unnatural for the next several hours.) I guess we can't all be Betty Crocker.
It might be time for chocolate and I to do a bit of redefining in our relationship. In light of this new evidence, I would be a fool to continue professing that chocolate is the answer to all life's connundrums. But I think I'll keep my magnet, just in case. :-)
posted by Erinn @ 8:35 PM
1 Comments:
At 7:34 AM,
bob said…
Picturing you and the chocolate milk grit sent me over the edge. You've got to put that in your book. It's hysterical!
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